Hope......

I got the long awaited call from Dr. M yesterday. You know, the one I have been sitting on pins and needles for...the one where he FINALLY tells me that we can officially start trying....you know...that one!!!! Well, I got it, but it did NOT come with the happy news I was expecting.

Let's go back to last week.......

I was called in for blood work. He was checking my progesterone and estrogen levels. 2 days later I get a call from the nurse, (who I have come to love, love even though we have never even met), and she says the tests came back..."kinda funny" and thinks that the lab must have made some type of mistake. So.....I go back in, get more blood drawn and wait....again...for the results. This time Dr. M calls and says the blood STILL looks "funny". He explains that my levels were borderline, not exactly where he would want them and that he would like to start me on Chlomid. I am actually ok with this little bit of news....if I can have twinsies....then woohoo!!!! Anyway, he also said that we, me and Corey, had to make the decision whether we start trying this month or next. He suggested that we wait another month, but my gut was saying...no way!

I went home with a heavy heart and tears in my eyes. When Corey got home we had a heart to heart. He was amazing to say the least. He encouraged me, lifted up my spirits and just let me cry. We decided that no matter what the final decision was it was ultimately up to God and that we were going to completely give this to him. Well, if you haven't guessed it already we decided that after these next 4 days of Chlomid we will start trying this month!!! I am excited, nervous and anxious all at the same time. I have been in constant contact with my very sweet nurse, who I mentioned earlier, and wrote her this morning about our decision. Now.....you just tell me God is not constantly by our side....this is what she wrote me.........

Rosemary,

I have been there with you. I have cried many tears and had to realize that only God can control our lives. With that being said, I can only tell you that God is incredible and has blessed the lives of me and my husband with three beautiful children, two through IVF and then one surprise pregnancy/blessing to boot. So, I will talk to Dr. Madden this morning when he gets in and we will discuss the questions you have. I will get back to you as soon as possible.

Hope this verse encourages you during this time in the lives of you and your husband:
Proverbs 3:5-6
Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding; In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths.
Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light. –

Shanda

I cannot tell you how relieved I was when I read her words....I just knew we made the right decision.

I will keep you all posted on how things progress.

Please, please...if I can ask for just one thing...please pray over me and my body and that it will, (if we get pregnant), hold on tightly to the little baby.

I HAVE HOPE!!!

Love to you all,

Rosemary